


Of Horses And Heartbreak

by Deathtouch



Series: Of Submissives and Their Owners [2]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Abused character, Alternate Universe - BDSM, Alternate Universe - Domestic, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bathing/Washing, Crying, Dom/sub Undertones, Domestic, Dominant/Submissive, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, Married Couple, Married Life, Master/Pet, Men Crying, Mentions of Character Death, Past Abuse, Petplay Undertones, Punishment, Training, implied/referenced PTSD, mentions of amputation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-21
Updated: 2017-06-21
Packaged: 2018-11-16 17:49:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11257854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deathtouch/pseuds/Deathtouch
Summary: ☛ in which i write a sequel toOf Collar And Kisses





	Of Horses And Heartbreak

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LittlexSheep](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittlexSheep/gifts).



> this is a sequel. please read [Of Collar And Kisses](http://archiveofourown.org/works/10716105) first! also please read and consider the additional tags on this fic! i chose not to use archive warnings, but that doesn't mean that none apply. this fic has multiple mentions of past abuse and other upsetting implications. also, jesse's age isn't specified so if underage is something that bothers you, this fic may not be for you.
> 
> written for the absolutely wonderful [littlexsheep](http://archiveofourown.org/users/LittlexSheep/pseuds/LittlexSheep) who was very kind and patient with me throughout the entire writing process. without them, there would be no sequel so everyone owes littlexsheep a veeery big thank you!!
> 
> also thanks to my wonderful beta [subwaywolf](http://archiveofourown.org/users/SubwayWolf/pseuds/SubwayWolf)!! he polished this fic off with his amazing beta-reader skills in no time at all. i'm so grateful every day to have someone like him who makes my work better!! thank you so much, subwaywolf!

"Kneel," Gabriel ordered.  
  
Jesse shifted down onto his knees with his back straight and his one arm tucked behind his body. All the books and training manuals online indicated that subs were supposed to cross their wrists behind their back; it was considered polite. Jesse didn't have wrists to cross, so they improvised.  
  
"Sit," Gabriel ordered next.  
  
Jesse sat back on his heels, looking up at his owner eagerly.  
  
"Present," Gabe ordered.  
  
Jesse hesitated. Usually when they ran through the cycle of positions, 'all fours' was next. It took him a second but he shifted forward, pressing his face down to the carpet. He adjusted his knees at the same time, moving them so that they were about shoulder width apart.  
  
If Gabe was standing behind the sub, he'd have one hell of a view. This wasn't the time to play around or admire Jesse's body, though. They were hard at work here. Training a sub was no easy task. Gabriel was determined to stay focused.  
  
"Good boy," he commended Jesse, squatting down to ruffle his soft brown hair. "Last one. All fours."  
  
Jesse moved smoothly onto all fours. He only hand the one hand, so it was technically all threes. He had to position his palm more towards the center of his body than under his shoulder like the official submissive guide suggested. Gabriel figured that was just fine.  
  
"Good job, Jesse."  
  
Gabriel had been working Jesse for months. Up until now it had been more general training, laying down basic guidelines and helping him adjust to a new home and new owners. They were finally digging in deep to the real stuff, the formal etiquette expected of an owned sub.  
  
Gabriel was shocked when he started in on the positions lessons last week only to find that Jesse knew all the positions already. Not only did he know them, he knew they best way to amend them to accommodate his missing limb. Someone had already taught him everything he needed to know. It was hard to imagine his previous owners doing such a thing. It seemed to Gabe that they spent more time starving and beating Jesse than training him, but he guessed they had managed to do both.  
  
"Alright, time for sit-ups. Let's go."  
  
Jesse groaned a little as he crawled around on the floor, shifting onto his back. He begrudgingly got into sit-up position. He didn't like working out. He had finally reached a healthy weight for his size. He was still thin, but Gabriel couldn't see his ribs anymore and that was important. They had packed meat onto his bones, and now it was time to pack some muscle on there too.  
  
Before owning a sub, Gabriel hadn't even considered that they might need to work out, but it made sense. It wasn't a good idea for anyone to lay around the house all day, subs included. A lot of guidelines suggested letting the sub choose their preferred way to work out. Some enjoyed running while others liked lifting weights. Gabe hoped to let Jesse choose soon, but for now they did simple sets of sit-ups, push-ups, and jumping jacks, plus plenty of stretches. Jesse still preferred cuddling up on the couch to training, but he would get used to it.  
  
Gabriel knelt down and held onto Jesse's bare feet. "You did fifteen yesterday, you can do sixteen today."  
  
Jesse waited for the go-ahead nod from Gabriel and sat up, grimacing a little. As soon as he was sitting, Gabe leaned in and captured his lips in a sweet kiss; quick and easy. He had to reinforce good behavior somehow, and kisses were very effective.  
  
Jack came shuffling in to the living room from down the hall. They had commandeered the space in front of the TV for training. He stood staring for a moment, waiting for the two of them to break their kiss. "Are you guys in almost finished, or still in the middle of things?” he asked.  
  
"We'll be another twenty minutes or so," Gabe guessed.  
  
"Do you want to come with me after you’re done?"  
  
Gabriel glanced over at his husband. “Where are you going?”  
  
He knew the answer, somewhere in the back of his mind. It was something he’d been told over breakfast. He'd been a little distracted, though. Jesse had been sitting on Jack's lap across the table, giggling every time Jack kissed his cheek. It was hard to remember anything else about this morning besides that. Hell, Gabriel couldn't even remember what he ate.  
  
“I have some papers I need to drop off at-“  
  
“Your brother’s house.” Gabe finished the sentence, nodding. He remembered now.  
  
They’d been dealing with deeds and real estate paperwork for the last decade. Ever since Jack had sold his father’s farm it was one thing or another. If it wasn’t the land, it was the farm equipment. Whenever they thought they were finally done with selling things and signing things, there was always some new document or some old one to follow up on.  
  
Gabe considered. “Which brother?” Some members of Jack’s family were significantly more racist and homophobic than others.  
  
“Jason.”  
  
Jason wasn’t so bad, all in all. Gabe gave Jesse a nod. “What do you say, buddy, want to go for a ride?”  
  
Jesse's eyebrows drew together in concern. He’d gotten used to car rides, but he still didn’t like them very much and he especially didn’t like going anywhere new. He shrugged his shoulders.  
  
“Hey, use your words.” Gabriel prompted gently.  
  
“Iono.” Jesse replied.  
  
Well, that was kind of a word. More like four different words smashed together to make one quiet mumble. To be fair, Jesse had spent the last four months of his life barely speaking at all. He’d been allowed to say a few key phrases, but other than that he was expected to remain silent. Most subs were trained that way. Most subs were also eventually given some leeway, and allowed to speak freely to other subs or when addressed by their owners. Jesse was just now reaching that point in his training. He may know all the official positions, but he was still warming up to the idea of responding when spoken to.  
  
“It’s fine, I’ll just drive there all alone with no one to keep me company in the car." Jack began to sulk away, feigning hurt. "No one to eat lunch with me on the way. No one to-“  
  
“Alright, alright.” Gabe laughed, calling after him. "We'll come. Give us some time to finish up."  
  
Jesse looked at Gabe expectantly.  
  
"Back to work. Fifteen more sit-ups."  


* * *

  
Gabe leaned against the bathroom door, listening to the soft noises of trickling water and murmured voices. He couldn't quite hear what was being said, but he could hear the cadence of conversation, and the soft music of laughter. Jesse was opening up a little better to Jack, it seemed. Gabriel found himself smiling softly, glad Jesse was opening up at all. He knocked twice on the door and stepped in.  
  
Although neither of them had been dripping with sweat or anything, it was still a good idea to wash up after working out. He had used the shower in the guest bathroom while Jack washed Jesse in the tub. The guest bathroom had shampoo and soap but that was about it. If he wanted to finish getting ready he would need his toothbrush, among other things. He joined the two of them in the master bathroom and fished out his deodorant from within the cabinet nearby.  
  
"Your hair's getting so long," Jack said, massaging shampoo bubbles into Jesse's scalp. "We should cut it soon."  
  
"Uh-uh." Jesse shook his head as he was getting shampooed.  
  
"Uh-uh?" Jack repeated curiously. "You like it long?"  
  
Jesse nodded.    
  
Jesse could probably take a bath himself. He was a good sub who took direction well. If they taught him what to do, he would do it on his own.

Gabe had said that exact thing to Jack months ago. He suggested teaching Jesse how to bathe himself so it would be one less chore in taking care of him. Jack refused. He said he didn’t mind doing it, and he liked getting to spend time with Jesse. Gabriel hadn’t really gotten it until now.  
  
"Tip your head back," Jack ordered. He plunged a pitcher into the bath water, foamy white with soap, and brought it up to rinse away the shampoo. Water and suds cascaded down Jesse's back. The scars on his neck glistened.  
  
Although seeing those marks was a painful reminder of the sub's past, it also made Gabriel realized just how far they had come. Jesse wasn't the scared sub cowering and covered in dirt anymore. He never would be again.  
  
"Good boy." Jack kissed Jesse's wet head. "Unplug the drain and we'll get you dried off."  
  
Gabriel had moved on to brushing his teeth by the time Jesse climbed out of the tub. The water was draining away at his ankles as Jack wrapped a warm, fluffy towel around his shoulders. He stepped over the ledge carefully, toes curling in the bath mat on the tiled floor. The two of them had this down to a science, a ritual almost. Jack helped rub him dry, not shying away from using the soft towel on any ticklish spots no matter how much Jesse squirmed and laughed. He helped Jesse rub most of the water out of his hair next. Only then, when the sub was relatively dry, did he allow Jesse to snatch up his bandana from the towel rack and hurriedly put it back on.  
  
They joined Gabriel by the mirror. Jack helped Jesse comb out his hair. It really was getting long. It suited the sub just fine, though. They’d keep it like that a while longer.  
  
“Go get your harness,” Jack said after combing out the few tangles in Jesse’s hair.  
  
The sub ducked out into the bedroom.  
  
“You’re so good with him,” Gabriel said quietly, voice warm with admiration. “You always make him laugh.”  
  
Jack turned his back to the bathroom counter and leaned on it. He offered his husband a charming smirk. “What can I say, I’m the better owner.”  
  
Gabe rolled his eyes. So much for trying to be nice. “Fucking asshole,” he muttered in good-natured annoyance. That was the last time he would compliment his husband for the next week at least.  
  
Although they did tend to make competition out of everything, neither of them were actually competing to be a ‘better owner’. They had conceded favorites, citing Jesse’s love for the both of them as evening the playing field. Now, it was all about who was raising Jesse the best, or teaching him the most, or earning the most meaningful bonding experience. Neither one of them could let the other hold the title of 'better owner' for too long.  
  
Jesse came back to the doorway, holding his harness aloft.  
  
"I'll help you with that, buddy," Jack offered at once.  
  
Unluckily for him, Gabriel was closer to the door and he got there quicker. "No, no. Let me," he volunteered.  


* * *

  
They set out from their neighborhood, heading south towards Martinsville. Jack’s brother lived about half an hour away from everything, but Martinsville was the closest town to his house. It wasn’t much of a town. It had a main street and a Wal-Mart off the state road, and that was good enough for Indiana to give it a name like Martinsville.  
  
Gabriel knew the way well enough. They usually went to Jason’s house for Thanksgiving. The drive was a full forty five minutes so they didn’t get out that way very often, but it was easy enough to visit. He relaxed back in the passenger seat, and read the reviews for local restaurants on his phone.  
  
“We could do fast food again,” he suggested. It was nearing lunch time and all three of them were hungry.  
  
“Yeah,” Jack agreed, though his tone conveyed a clear lack of enthusiasm for that idea.  
  
“There’s a couple of diners on the way.” Gabriel noted that most of them were marked with the lowercase ‘s’ in a circle on the app, indicating that they were sub friendly. Most restaurants were, these days.  
  
When he was much younger, he remembered seeing places with ‘No shirt, no shoes, no service. No subs.’ signs out front. He knew there were still fine dining places that discouraged owners from bringing their subs, but those kinds of restaurants were few and far between. Times were changing, and businesses that didn’t cater to submissives weren’t thriving like they used to.  
  
“A diner might be nice. Jesse likes American food.” Jack glanced up to the rearview mirror from the road and looked at the reflection of the sub sitting in the back seat. “Don’t you, big guy?”  
  
Jesse looked away from the window, worrying his lip between his teeth. He didn’t like car rides. He didn’t say anything.  
  
“S’okay buddy. We’ll get you some lunch soon.” Gabe reached back to pat his thigh. “You want some food?” Food was always a good distraction.  
  
Jesse nodded eagerly.  
  
The buildings and houses of their neighborhood melted away into farmland pretty quickly. Corn lined the sides of the roads in fields that stretched on for miles. If it wasn’t corn, it was wheat. If it wasn’t a crop at all, it was cows ranging and chewing grass out in the midday sun.  
  
Gabriel had been kind of surprised the first time he saw this side of Indiana. He’d grown up in California, and not in the nicest neighborhood. If he drove for twenty minutes, the only thing he would reach was a ritzier side of town or possibly the beach depending on what road he took. He still remembered the long drive when he first moved here, carting a U-Haul with all his worldly possessions behind him.  
  
He’d been impressed by the expansive plains of Kansas at first, rather than infinitely bored with them. At least there were farms in Indiana. They were something to look at other than the horizon. The road to Martinsville looked especially nice today. The sky was blue, the clouds were perfect cumulus clusters, and the grass and trees were bright green. This was the kind of scenery in cartoons or children’s books. It was too peaceful to be true.  
  
“Uh.” Jesse’s whisper was so quiet it was almost impossible to hear him. “Can I ask somthin’?”  
  
“Yes, you may,” Gabe allowed, secretly very pleased that Jesse was speaking to them.  
  
“Where we goin’?”  
  
They had explained to Jesse before they left where they were going and why. They always did, even when they left the house without him. They had recently gotten into the habit of telling him how long they would be gone. Gabriel had shown him how to count the hours on a clock. It made him less nervous about being home alone.  
  
“We’re going to get some food, and then we’re going to go visit Jack’s brother,” Gabriel patiently explained again.  
  
“Y’all, uh, ain’t leavin’ me nowhere though, right?” he asked hopefully.  
  
A pang of guilt ached through Gabriel’s chest. He glanced back at Jesse and offered a reassuring smile. “No, Jesse. Never. We’ll all go back home afterwards.”  
  
Jesse tried to smile too. “Okay. Thank you, sir.”  
  
Gabriel hadn't taught Jesse the particulars of when to say 'sir' or 'ma'am'. He just did it on his own at irregular intervals. Gabe suspected that whoever had taught him all the proper positions had probably instilled some manners in him too. It was hard enough to pry responses out of him at all, much less responses with perfect use of formalities. Gabriel was letting the inconsistencies slide for now. He wanted to get Jesse talking first, then they'd work on refining his speech.  
  
Jack wisely reached out and turned up the radio. A news caster told them all about the sunny weather and clear skies ahead. It masked the quiet that followed. Gabe shared a look with his husband in the meantime. There was so much they still didn't know about Jesse or what had happened to him before they found him.  
  
They never pressed Jesse for answers about his missing limb, or how he'd ended up in the woods, and he never offered anything up. Sometimes Gabe wanted to ask. He wanted to know all the details of what had happened to the sub before this. He wanted to hear every horror and confront it head on. He knew he couldn't, though. Jesse had been through enough in his life, he didn't need new owners who forced him to relive his dark past at their whim.  
  
Jack and Gabe had discussed at length how to approach the subject. They wanted Jesse to feel safe, to talk about it if he wanted to, to get the pain of it all out of his system if that's what he needed. Gabriel had listened to podcasts and read whole books on rearing rescued subs.  
  
Sometimes owners weren't the best option to explore this kind of thing. They might need to take him to an expert, to a therapist or sub specialist. Gabe kind of hated the idea. He didn't want Jesse to think they were passing his problems off to someone else.  
  
The only thing Gabe knew right now was that they didn't know what to do, and so they did nothing. They would give it time until they came to a conclusion.  
  
They didn't ask Jesse any questions. They listened to the radio and drove to Martinsville, clouds and corn fields passing by.  


* * *

  
Pearl's Diner was just off the highway. The building looked like it had seen better days, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. The hand-painted sign and the potted plants out front gave it a welcoming vibe. The gravel of the parking lot crunched under the wheels of the SUV as they pulled into a spot. Jesse was nervously looking from window to window, taking in their surroundings.  
  
"We're going to go in there and get some food." Gabriel pointed to the restaurant. "You gonna be a good boy?"  
  
Jesse nodded.  
  
Jack got out of the car and slid on a pair of sunglasses at the same time. He turned to the back seat and opened the door for Jesse. Gabe circled around the back of the car in time to see Jesse put his feet down on the parking lot and grimace slightly. The gravel probably didn't feel that nice on his bare feet.  
  
Subs were almost always kept naked, and that included shoes. Some people liked to dress their subs in shirts or sweaters. Gabe always thought that was in poor taste. He supposed some of them did like wearing clothes, but most didn't need clothing, especially in moderate climates. He understood wrapping a sub up in a coat during winter time, but anything else just seemed unnecessary. Jesse stole hoodies to cuddle up with and even wear from time to time, but his harness suited him much better than a t-shirt would.  
  
Lately, it seemed that shoes were coming into fashion for subs. It looked a little funny to see a sub walking around with sneakers on their feet and nothing else, but it made sense, especially on hot pavement or ice-slicked sidewalks. Maybe they would have to invest in getting Jesse a nice sturdy pair of shoes. If he wanted to wear them, it wouldn't be a bad idea. It was summer now and the weather was nice but winter was just two seasons away and taking Jesse out into the snow without boots seemed cruel.  
  
"Here, hop on." Jack turned his back to Jesse and ducked down low.  
  
Jesse hesitated before smiling. He boosted himself up into piggy back position. Jack groaned comically before straightening up.  
  
"Ugh, no more training for you. You're too muscular; too heavy to lift."  
  
"Yessir, no more trainin'," Jesse agreed.  
  
"Oh please, training's not that bad," Gabriel insisted, closing the car door.  
  
He followed them across the parking lot and up to the front of the building. Jesse was so comfortable clinging to Jack's body, cheek pressed against his shoulder, that Jack didn't immediately put him down. Gabe stepped ahead to open the door for them.  
  
The smell of food from inside was delicious. Since it was lunch time, there were plenty of people sitting at tables, eating and sharing meals. The scrape of knives and forks and the murmur of conversation almost drowned out the sound of the grill sizzling in the open kitchen. Gabe walked up to the vacant hostess stand, ready and waiting to be seated.  
  
"Hey, Jess. Do you know that word?" Jack asked. He pointed to the red glowing exit sign above the door. He shifted Jesse's weight on his back, hiking him up higher. It was wise to keep the sub occupied. He bristled up around large groups of people, often becoming either aggressive or unresponsive. The less he was focused on the people dining, the better.  
  
Jesse peeked at the sign and then shook his head.  
  
"I think you do. Do you remember the second letter in your name?"  
  
Jesse shook his head again. Now that there were other people around, he wasn't feeling so chatty.  
  
"Yes you do. What comes after the 'J'?" Jack pressed him.  
  
Jesse shrugged. He hid his face against Jack's blue shirt. It was clear he didn't want to have a spelling lesson right now.  
  
"Hi, how many?" A hostess interrupted. She was an older woman with blonde hair that was turning grey, strung up in a ponytail. Her voice was raspy from age and years of smoking. She didn't look all that impressed with the three of them, but that might have been because of a long shift at work. Gabe wouldn't blame her for that.  
  
"Three." He gestured with two fingers and his thumb.  
  
She pursed her lips and collected some menus and silverware from behind the stand. "Y'all can follow me," she said, leading the way back into the dining room.  
  
Gabe glanced back to see Jesse was no longer clinging to Jack's back. He was still clutching desperately at his owner's arm though, and he was practically stepping on Jack's feet he was so close to him as they walked. He didn't seem agitated, just apprehensive.  
  
The hostess lead them to a booth surrounded on both sides by people. Jesse hid in Jack's shadow.  
  
"Go sit in that seat, Jesse," Jack instructed.  
  
Jesse didn't move.  
  
"That sub's gonna have to sit on the floor, sir." The hostess spoke up.  
  
Jack and Gabe both looked at her at the same time. Jack was the one to speak up. "Excuse me?"  
  
She pursed her lips again. "It's considered polite," she told them, in a tone that carried so much more than her words. She wasn't telling them it was polite, she was telling them they had better do it or they weren't welcome to eat here.  
  
"I don't think-"  
  
Gabriel held up a hand to stop his husband from talking. At that very moment his eyes fell past Jack to a table behind him. A petite sub was curled up on the hard wood floor at her owner's feet. She was young with soft features. Her owner was a grizzled looking guy with more fat than muscle and a tangled brown beard. He was staring hard at them, taking in the entire exchange. If he didn't have a gun on him, there was surely one in the truck he probably drove out in the parking lot.  
  
He didn't scare Gabriel. No one did. Gabe worked private security for a living. He had been in the military before that. Some greasy Indiana hick was no match for him. What bothered him about this predicament was the bit in the sub's mouth, and the way her hands were tied behind her back. Those were the kinds of restraints meant for violent subs who couldn't be controlled, not soft ones who obediently sat beside their owners.  
  
This place wasn't one they wanted to stay and eat at.  
  
"Maybe we should take our business elsewhere," he suggested calmly.  
  
The hostess cleared her throat. "Maybe you should."  
  
Gabriel nodded towards the front of the restaurant. Jesse was already clinging to Jack's hand, he didn't need to be pulled along. He went willingly as they headed right back out the way they came.  
  
None of them said anything, not even when they were back outside in the parking lot. They were all so intent on leaving, and quickly, that Jesse crossed the gravel without even wincing.  
  
Jack helped him into the back before sliding into the driver’s seat. Without knowing where they were going, he turned on the car and peeled out of the parking lot. The radio had come on the second he turned the key in the ignition, but not even the car commercial that was playing couldn't distract from the notable silence among them.  
  
"Well, that settles it," Gabriel said after a moment. "Indiana is full of backward hicks and we need to pack up and move back to California immediately."  
  
Jack rolled his eyes and shook his head, but that didn't stop him from smiling. "Yeah, because you miss the cost of living there so much."  
  
Gabriel honestly didn't miss his home state at all. He'd gotten out of there the first chance he had, signing up for the armed forces at a tender age of 17. After he finished his service, he went back to California because he had no idea where else to go. Fortunately he'd met Jack in the military and their contracts expired at the same time. Gabriel didn't have to go back to California alone, he had a fiancé with him.  
  
The few years he spent with Jack in San Francisco were marred by constant apartment-hopping. They were living off military salaries and they couldn't find a place to stay that didn't drain their funds. It was probably a good thing they got out.  
  
Indiana was cold in the winter, and it had pockets of intolerable people outside the cities and suburbs. They had a home here though, and that meant something. They had Jesse. If they had never moved here, if they had stayed in California instead, they never would have found him. He would have been chained to that tree in the woods and left to die.  
  
"Ah, I guess there are a few good things about Indiana," he conceded. "Even if their idea of a sub-friendly restaurant is a little skewed."  
  
Jack took a right turn, inexplicably driving onto a dirt road.  
  
“Where are you going?” Gabriel asked. It had been a while since they visited Jason, but he was pretty sure there were no dirt roads involved. Not until they reached the dirt driveway of Jason's house and they weren’t quite there yet.  
  
“There’s a burger place down this way,” Jack gestured towards the windshield vaguely.  
  
He was right. Soon enough they were pulling into the parking lot. It was an odd little building with a two drive-thrus. A metal awning stretched out from one side, and picnic tables sat in the shade. This place looked like it had seen better days too, but unlike Pearl's there was no inviting hand painted sign or potted plants. Just trash cans swarming with bees and a sun-faded menu board. That was alright by Gabriel. He'd just about had it with Indiana's misleading peacefulness.  
  
Again, they all piled out. Jesse was a little less willing this time. When Jack opened the door for him he sat where he was, looking out the open car door with a concerned expression on his face.  
  
"C'mon buddy, out of the car." Jack ordered.  
  
He didn't move.  
  
"Hey," Jack softened easily. He reached out to rub the sub's shoulder. "I know we said we would get food at the last place, but they weren't very nice to subs in there. I bet you're hungry, huh? We're actually going to get some food this time. So let's go. Out of the car."  
  
Jesse still didn't move.  
  
"Jess..."  
  
Jesse beckoned his owner close with a small wave of his hand. Gabriel watched from a few feet away. He stretched upwards and whispered right into Jack's ear. It was impossible to hear what he said. Jack pulled back and rubbed his shoulder again.  
  
"No, buddy. It's not your fault we had to leave the last place. You were a good boy." He wasn't quite whispering but his words had dropped down low.  
  
Jesse whispered to him again, this time without leaning into Jack's ear. "Y'all not gonna leave me?"  
  
"No, we won't leave you here," Jack promised him.  
  
Jesse gave in and tentatively stepped out. He saw Gabriel holding his hand out and hurried over to him, clutching his arm. The two of them made their way to one of the many empty picnic tables. Gabriel realized there was nowhere else to sit. The small building didn't seem to have a dining room. There were plenty of cars in the drive-thru, and Gabe noticed a few people sitting in their cars and eating. It was kind of perfect. It felt like they were alone together out there. There were no strangers for Jesse to be wary of.  
  
Gabriel sat down on one of the red metal picnic benches. There was a plastic napkin holder on the table, and the brown napkin sticking out from the top fluttered in the light breeze. The table was a little sticky and there were ketchup stains that needed to be cleaned. It wasn’t completely disgusting, just typical of outdoor tables. He told Jesse to sit down next to him and Jesse did. He pulled on Gabe’s arm, forcing it around his shoulders. He then ducked low and hid his face in his owner’s side.  
  
“What’s the matter, something wrong?” Gabe asked him.  
  
Jesse didn’t reply.  
  
“Don’t worry, we’ll go home soon,” he promised.  
  
Jack sat down across from them a few minutes later. He had a receipt in hand and three drinks. “I ordered for you.”  
  
Gabe glanced over his shoulder to the sun-faded menu. There weren’t many options. Burgers, chicken tenders, fries. Nothing he wouldn’t eat. He noticed a small window and counter. He could see a few teenagers inside, toiling away over a grill.  
  
“You know, I used to work here,” Jack added thoughtfully.  
  
Gabriel’s eyebrows went up. “Wait a minute… this place?”  
  
He’d heard stories of Jack flipping burgers at a little drive-thru joint in high school to pay for his first car. Mostly he had heard about the hijinks. How the ice cream machine broke one day and would not stop oozing out vanilla ice cream, so they gave free cones away to every customer.  
  
One summer the owner had apparently tasked Jack with getting rid of a wasp nest that was forming above the dumpsters. Jack’s excellent plan was to spray it with kitchen cleaner and earned three wasp stings in the removal attempt. It amused Gabe to no end to think of Jack wearing an apron, sweating above a stove, eating fries on his break.  
  
“Well, not this location exactly.” Jack admitted. “I worked at one closer to my house, but it’s the same owner. Same food. Same red picnic tables.”  
  
Gabe smiled. He couldn’t believe they had never eaten here before. In the last ten years they’d been living in Indiana, driving past this place to get to Jason’s house, they hadn’t stopped once. He was glad they were finally getting around to it. Leaving Pearl’s Diner was definitely the right choice.  


* * *

  
Jesse barely pulled away from Gabriel long enough to eat. Normally the sight, or even just the smell of food perked him right up. He clearly wasn’t having it today. Gabe was somewhat tempted to order him to face the table and act right, but he didn’t want to push the sub too hard. They still had somewhere to go after this, and if Jesse was already upset it was better to tread lightly. He let Jesse lean into him and hide against his side once he’d finished his food. They would wait for some other day to correct this behavior.  
  
Jack cleaned up their garbage when they were done, braving the buzzing bees by the trashcan to throw their wrappers and plastic cups away. It was nice out. They were out of the sun, and the breeze was pleasant without being too strong. It almost seemed like a shame to shuffle back into the hot SUV so soon. The quicker they got to Jason’s house, the quicker they could go back to being on their own. They didn’t waste any time getting back on the road once their meal was done.  
  
Fortunately, they were nearly there. It was only another short ten-minute drive before they arrived. Jack’s brother Jason had quite a few acres of land. Bright green grass covered the entire plot for as far as the eye could see. There were white fences surrounding the property. He owned a few horses, and two were out grazing when they pulled up. Jesse went from quietly sitting in the back to glued to the window. He even slid across the seat to get a better look at the barn in the distance. He didn’t seem upset, just attentive.  
  
They rolled up the long dirt driveway towards a powder blue house. It was a gorgeous farm house with multiple floors, big beautiful windows, and a wooden porch out front. Gabriel had spent enough Thanksgivings here to know how nice and homey the place was. He didn’t necessarily want to live here, but he could certainly see why someone would.  
  
Jack gathered up the papers and legal documents he needed from where he’d tucked them beside the driver’s seat. He looked back at Jesse, who was kneeling on the seat and staring at the barn out the back window.  
  
Jack reached back to tap the sub’s hip. “Ready to meet my brother?”  
  
Jesse reluctantly turned away from the window. He looked at Jack and hesitated for a second before nodding.  
  
“Be polite, alright buddy?” Jack encouraged.  
  
Jesse nodded again. He would.  
  
This time when they got out, Jesse didn’t cling to any of them. He stayed close to Gabriel, but kept looking over his shoulder at the horses. Maybe when they were done visiting, Gabe would walk him over to the fence to see the animals a little closer. Jason would probably let them feed one of the horses an apple if they asked, but Gabriel also knew that they could be temperamental animals. He didn't want Jesse to get bit. Looking was probably a better idea than feeding.  
  
Together they walked up the front steps. Jack reached out to pull back the screen door and then he knocked on the house door within. They waited patiently, listening to the noises of footsteps creaking over hard wood. It took a few minutes but Jason finally answered. It was eerie, he looked so much like Jack while not looking anything like him at all. He had the same color hair and blue eyes, even the same face shape. For some god awful reason he had a mustache, bright blonde bristles of hair. It suited him fine, but Gabriel shuddered to think of his husband growing one of those.  
  
“Ah, jeez, Jack. You didn’t have to drive all the way out here,” he said good-naturedly as he stood in the doorway.  
  
“I don’t want these getting lost in the mail like the judgment lien documents did.” Jack reasoned, gesturing with the file folder in his hand.  
  
“Gabe.” Jason’s smile faded and he nodded at him. “Good to see you, pal.”  
  
That probably wasn’t true. Most of Jack’s family didn’t like Gabriel at all. At least Jason pretended and acted cordial. That was about all Gabe could ask for. He offered his own nod. “Good to see you too, Jason.”  
  
“Well, why don’t you two come in.” He stepped back from the doorway and waved them inside. “Sit and chat for a bit before you’re on your way.”  
  
Gabriel probably should have realized something then, when Jason said ‘you two’ and not ‘you three’. In truth, he didn’t think much of the comment. Most people barely recognized subs as worth speaking to. It didn’t seem entirely out of place. It wasn’t until he turned to order Jesse inside with them that he realized Jesse wasn’t there.  
  
He just... wasn't there.  
  
Gabe felt suddenly and immediately nauseous. His heart dropped into the pit of his stomach and his mouth went dry with fear. A white hot panic seared through him. This had never happened. They had never ever had any fear of losing him before. He clung so close to them at all times, they didn’t even need to use a leash. He’d never wandered off on his own. Not once. Gabe was so shocked he didn’t even move at first.  
  
“Jesse…” he meant to call out the sub’s name but it was a low noise instead. “Jesse!” He tried again, louder, hurrying back to the car.  
  
Was Jesse still in there? Had he refused to get out? Gabe opened the side door and stared hard at the empty back seat. No, no. He’d definitely gotten out. He’d followed them onto the porch. Gabe remembered seeing him, seeing Jesse look over his shoulder at… _the barn_.  
  
Gabriel started off in a run and then broke into an even faster sprint. He couldn’t remember the last time he covered a distance so fast as the one between the house and the barn. He made the white fence look like a runner’s hurdle. He wasn’t thinking, he just went. He prayed to God that Jesse was just in the barn somewhere, unharmed. If he wasn’t there Gabe had no idea where else he could be and that thought was terrifying.  
  
The barn door was open. Gabriel went racing in, barely slowing to a stop once he passed through the open doorway. It was almost too dark inside compared to the bright sun outside. In the seconds it took for his eyes to adjust, Gabe caught his breath and called to his sub again.  
  
"Jesse!”  
  
He felt sick thinking that Jesse might not be here. If not here then where? Where? Gabe could hear Jack and Jason calling to him back at the house. They were calling out Jesse’s name as well. He ignored them both and moved through the stables, trying to swallow past the lump of worry in his throat.  
  
One of the stable doors was left open. Not hanging open, just not closed. Gabe approached with caution, and pried it back hoping he wouldn't get trampled by a horse in the process. He was so surprised to see Jesse standing in there, he didn’t even feel relieved at first. It took him a second to understand what was happening, but the sub was reaching under a giant chestnut mare’s belly, adjusting the straps of a saddle.  
  
“Jesse… Jesus, be careful!” Gabe could handle just about anything, but he didn’t know how to deal with horses. He was terrified that Jesse would get bit or kicked or worse. Gabe didn’t want to spook the animal. He refrained from raising his voice or rushing into the stall. He stood there, numb. He had no idea how to extricate Jesse from this situation safely and it felt horrible to just and watch, to let it all happen.  
  
“S’okay.” Jesse said softly. He reached up to grip the reigns with his good hand. “I know what to do.” In the next second he stuck his foot in the stirrup and mounted the house expertly. It was such a quick, smooth motion. He was up there before Gabe even had a chance to register what Jesse was going to do.  
  
Gabe watched in quiet confusion as Jesse dug his bare heels into the horse’s side. He urged the animal forward, and so it went. Gabe had to stumble out of the way less the horse run him over. They passed right by him on the way towards the open barn door.  
  
It hit Gabriel how inexplicable and odd all this really was. Jesse was riding a horse. He knew how to ride a horse? Where did he learn how to ride a horse? Gabe felt his head swim like he was stuck underwater. It was unreal to see Jesse pass through the barn doors. He was suddenly bathed in sunlight, his tan skin and the horses’ brown hide shining.  
  
Gabriel slowly followed after, keeping some distance. He watched as Jesse brought the horse into a gallop, loping around the lawn. Jack and Jason stood stock still at a gate in the white fence. They too stared as it happened. A sub riding a horse. None of them knew what to do, or how this was even possible.  
  
“I’m sorry… what’s going on?” Jason spoke up after a moment.  
  
“I…  don’t know.” Jack looked to Gabe, and Gabe only shrugged. He didn’t understand any of this either.  
  
Jesse circled the horse around the fenced in area and was coming back around. He had a bright grin on his face, smiling bigger than Gabriel had ever seen him smile his whole life. He eased the horse from its quick gallop to a slower gait. He knew precisely what he was doing.  
  
“Jesse!” Jack called out, somewhat sternly. “That’s not your horse. You don’t have permission to ride it.”  
  
Jesse’s smile faded a little. He noticed Jason there and froze up. All his happiness and confidence from a moment ago completely melted away. Jason unlocked the gate in the fence and stepped up to his animal. He took it by the reigns and Jesse all but recoiled. Jack followed after his brother and reached out his arms for the sub.  
  
“Come here,” Jack ordered calmly.  
  
Jesse dismounted easily. Jack helped him down and held onto him, keeping him close.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Jesse whispered. He suddenly seemed to realize the gravity of what he’d done, running away from his owners and absconding with a horse. Gabe was close enough to all of this that he could see the tears form in Jesse’s eyes and the way his bottom lip began to tremble. Jesse swallowed hard. “I’m sorry, I-“  
  
“Shh,” Jack quieted him.  
  
“She’s okay,” Jason said, referring to the horse. “He didn’t hurt her.”  
  
Jesse turned suddenly. “No! I wouldn’t!” He insisted, and then seemed to realize he was speaking out loud to a stranger. His eyes went wide and big tears spilled down his cheeks, making tear tracks on his face. He turned to Jack and began to cry. “I would never hurt-“  
  
“Jesse, be quiet.” Jack interrupted him. He pulled the sub in for a hug. Jesse whimpered low and hid his face, mostly in shame. “Why don’t you take the horse back to stable. We’ll walk up to the house and figure all this out.”  


* * *

  
They left the SUV doors open to let the breeze roll through. Gabriel could hear the soft buzz of cicadas over Jesse’s quiet sniffles and cries. The sub’s shoulders shook with trembling breaths and occasional sobs. He’d cried so much he’d soaked through the pants over Gabe’s thigh.  
  
“Just breathe,” Gabe reminded him, gently stroking his brown hair. “Breathe, buddy. It’s okay. You’re going to be okay.”  
  
Jack was inside talking to his brother. Jason wasn’t necessarily angry, just confused. He didn’t even know Jack had a sub, and he’d never seen Jesse before today. From his view it was as though a complete stranger had broken into his stables and started riding a horse. That had to be weird for him. Jack was in the house explaining all this away somehow. Since Jason didn’t like him all that much, Gabriel opted to stay outside and keep the Jesse calm instead. It wasn’t really going well.  
  
It had been a long time since Jesse cried like this. It hurt to hear him cry. The first few months after they rescued him were fraught with sobbing fits and breakdowns. That didn’t really happen anymore, now that he’d adjusted. Sometimes he had bad dreams and he sobbed during the night but that was different somehow. Gabe wished there was more he could do for Jesse than this.  
  
The house door peeled back, and Jack emerged pushing the screen door open. Gabe was glad. He had only been in there ten minutes or so, but ten minutes of listening to Jesse cry felt like a lifetime. Jack jogged down the porch steps and approached the car. He didn’t immediately go for the driver’s seat. Instead he looked in on them, eyes drawn to Jesse where he was curled up on the seat with his head in Gabe’s lap.  
  
“Everything’s okay. Jason’s not mad.” He explained. “He says if Jesse ever wants to come ride one of his horses, he’s more than welcome. He just needs to ask permission first.” Jack was definitely announcing all of this for Jesse’s benefit.  
  
Gabe nodded solemnly.  
  
“Are you guys okay?” He ventured to ask. He must have thought things looked worse than they were.  
  
Gabe simply nodded again. “Yeah. The sooner we get home the better. I’ll think I should sit back here with him.”  
  
Jack agreed. He closed one of the car doors before climbing into the front. Gabe stretched out to close the other. The awkward silences from earlier were nothing compared to the feeling in the car now. Jesse’s tears finally dried up once they started back on the road, but he didn’t move from his position. Gabe gently stroked his hair during the long car ride back.  


* * *

  
Glad to be home, Jesse willingly uncurled from the seat and got out when ordered. His face was red from all the crying he’d done. He waited patiently by the car and took Jack’s hand, letting himself be lead inside. Jack and Gabriel stood in the living room and looked to one another, not quite sure what to do now.  
  
“Go take your harness off,” Gabriel said after a moment. He pointed down the hall towards the master bedroom. Jesse knew where to put his harness when he was done wearing it. He could do that by himself. “When you’re done, sit on the bed and wait. Understand?”  
  
Jesse nodded, completely dejected. He slowly started down the hall.  
As soon as he was out of earshot, Jack let out a low sigh.  "What happened?” He asked.  
  
“I don’t know.” Gabe ran his hand over his own head trying to think. “I looked back and he was just gone, Jack.”  
  
“Where did he learn to ride horses?”  
  
That was the real question, wasn’t it? It didn’t make sense. Sure there were subs with talents and skills. Many could dance or sing. He’d even heard of some subs learning to draw or playing an instrument. They didn’t ride horses, though. That was so odd. It didn’t add up. They didn’t know much about Jesse’s previous owners, but there was no way the same people who abused and beat him had taught him how to ride.  
  
“We’re going to have to punish him,” Gabriel realized sadly. He’d sort of known that all along, and it didn’t feel good saying it out loud.  
  
Jack seemed surprised. “What?”  
  
“He ran off.” Gabriel pointed out. “He knows he’s not supposed to do that.”  
  
Jack frowned. “Does he? Have we ever told him not to leave our sides when we’re out? I know I haven’t…”  
  
Jesse usually held their hands, or their clothes, or literally clutched their arms. They barely even used a leash these days. Gabe suddenly wasn’t sure he had ever laid down clear rules about walking away from them in public. He had been meaning to work on it. He wanted to get to the point that even when leashed Jesse would follow two feet behind them wherever they went. That was the ideal, but they had to break him of his clinging habit first. It was on Gabe's to-do list but it hadn’t come up in any of their training yet.  
  
“Still, he needs to know he can’t do that again.” He reasoned. “Not to mention he took something that didn't belong to him. He definitely knows he's not supposed to do that. Most subs just take candy or toys but no, ours had to go and steal a horse."  
  
"He didn't steal it. He just rode it." Jack said. "Gabe, where did he learn to ride a horse?"  
  
"I don't know," Gabriel reiterated, slightly bemused that this was the sticking point for Jack here. "It doesn't matter because he did it without our permission."  
  
“What are you going to do?” Jack asked.  
  
Gabe grimaced. They had never really punished Jesse before. They never needed to. He’d misbehaved, but not like this. All he needed was a stern reminder of the rules and he usually corrected his behavior on his own. Even when he used to get angry and break things, upend the coffee table or tear something off the wall, he was never punished afterwards. Once he calmed down all they had to do was make him clean it up and apologize. Eventually he learned not to do it anymore.  
  
Gabriel knew all the typical punishments. Caging subs, spanking them, refusing to feed them dinner. All things he wouldn’t dare do, even if they were effective. They didn’t even own a cage, and if they did he wouldn’t actually make Jesse sleep in it. What happened if he had a nightmare? Were they just supposed to leave him in there, sobbing and writhing between the bars?  
  
He certainly wasn’t going to hit Jesse either, even if it was just a spanking. It might be a persuasive punishment for other subs, but not for a rescue who’d been beaten by previous owners. Refusing food was just too cruel. He couldn’t believe that was still a punishment at all in this day and age.  
  
Gabriel realized he’d been standing there in the living room for a long time in silence. “I don’t know.” He said for the second time. He hated not knowing. He cared about Jesse so much, and cared about training him right. This was just such an odd situation. “I guess we could try a time out.”  
  
Jack shrugged. “You know best.”  
  
Gabe looked at him and suddenly couldn’t help cracking a smile. Even now, when things were so confusing. “Yeah. I mean, I am the better owner so…”  
  
“Oh my god.” Thankfully Jack laughed, too. Just a little punch of humor to diffuse the tension. It felt nice for a moment, like everything would be okay.  
  
Together, they walked down the hall to the bedroom. The door was open and the lights were on. Jesse was sitting at the end of the bed without his harness. He was staring down at the floor and didn’t bother to look up when his owners came in.  
  
“Hey, Jess.” Gabe sat down beside the sub on the bed. He usually had no problems disciplining him, but something about this felt so much harder than any other time. “You know you’re in trouble, don’t you?” he asked, trying to be understanding.  
  
It was so quiet in the bedroom, he could hear it when Jesse swallowed nervously.  
  
“I hope you also know that you’re not a bad sub. Jack and I still love you very much. We’re not going to get rid of you or hurt you just because you did something wrong.” He reached out and pulled Jesse into a side hug, kissing the top of his head. Jesse melted against him, sniffling sadly. “I need you to understand, you can’t run away from us like that ever again. Not ever. I had no idea where you were. I was scared you had gotten lost. I thought we would never find you."  
  
"I'm sorry," Jesse croaked pathetically.  
  
"I accept your apology but I want to hear you promise me you won’t run away like that again.”  
  
“I promise,” Jesse murmured. His low voice was watery with all the crying he’d been doing.  
  
“You can’t take things that don’t belong to you either.” He continued. “That horse wasn’t yours. You had no business going near it, much less climbing on it to ride it. You know better than that. As punishment, you’ll have to sit in the corner until dinner.”     
  
Jesse nodded. He wasn’t going to fight it.  
  
“Come on.” Gabriel stood up. He kept an arm around Jesse's shoulders and gently urged him along.  
  
They made their way back out to the living room. It seemed unkind to leave him in the bedroom during his punishment. He was going to have to spend the next hour on his knees staring at the wall, he didn’t need to be isolated and alone while doing it. Besides, it would be easier to keep an eye on Jesse out here just in case something went wrong.  
  
"In the corner," he ordered. "Kneel.”  
  
Jesse went willingly. He got down onto the proper position on his knees with his one arm behind his back. He had a perfect view of the white walls in front of him.  
  
“Good boy. Stay there until I tell you you can move.” Gabe stepped back.  
  
For some reason, he thought it would be harder than that. He thought Jesse would cry more or put up a fight. It still didn’t feel good to punish him, but it had to be done. The scolding part went better than he had hoped, and with some luck the rest of the punishment would fly by with ease.  
  
“Can I clean his face?” Jack asked quietly. He seemed hesitant to interrupt the punishment process.  
  
Gabe nodded. That was fine.  
  
Jack disappeared into the kitchen and returned with a damp washcloth. He approached Jesse in the corner and had him tip back his head. He gently scrubbed away the salty tears staining his skin. “There you go, buddy. No more tears, okay? Be a good boy.”  
  
It felt odd to go about the rest of their afternoon without Jesse by their sides. If he wasn’t helping them with the household chores he was always cuddled up on the couch with them, or begging to be played with. Doing laundry and cleaning the bathroom didn’t feel particularly different, but Gabe noticed his absence when he was sitting on the sofa. There was no one there to nuzzle his thigh, no soft brown hair to play with.  
  
It was hard to focus on his tablet. Reading the news just didn't capture his attention. If he wasn't glancing up at the clock on his screen, he was looking across the room to check on Jesse again and again.  
  
"Kneel,” he had to remind the sub.  
  
Jesse had sunken down to a sitting position somewhere in the midst of his punishment. He shifted at once, easing his weight off his heels and straightening his back.  
  
Time seemed to be moving slow for Gabe, so he couldn’t imagine how long it felt for Jesse who had nothing to do but to sit in the corner and keep his position. He was relieved when the hour was up. He didn't wait a second longer to end the punishment.  
  
“Okay, Jesse," he said, approaching the corner. "That’s enough. Stand up.”  
  
Jesse rose from the carpet with a low groan. His knees were probably aching.  
  
“I know you said you were sorry earlier, but do you want to give me a formal apology for your misbehavior?” he prompted. He usually didn’t give Jesse a choice when giving orders, but this was different. This wasn’t an order. It didn’t mean anything if Jesse didn’t apologize willingly.  
  
Thankfully, the sub nodded his head. “Sorry, sir.” He mumbled quietly. “Sorry I ran off and sorry for what I done without permission.”  
  
Gabe hugged him. “I forgive you. You served your punishment so you’re not in trouble anymore.” He couldn't stop himself from running his fingers through Jesse’s hair. “Go see if Jack wants any help with dinner.”  
  
Jesse nodded and, after stretching his legs a little, wandered off to go find Jack.  
  
Gabriel could hear them talking quietly in the kitchen not long after that. He couldn’t quite hear what was being said but he could hear the cadence of conversation. Unlike this morning, there was no music of laughter. He got up from the couch and meandered closer, making himself busy in the dining room nearby. He listened for words among the sound of a knife on the cutting board and the stove top clicking.  
  
“No, buddy. Gabe and I don’t use belts to punish subs,” Jack said softly.  
  
“Y’all …just wear them?” Jesse asked, sounding incredulous.  
  
Gabe’s heart ached. He suddenly wished he hadn’t come closer to listen.  


* * *

  
“Tomorrow morning we can start leash training.” Gabe suggested, twisting the spaghetti on his plate around with his fork.  
  
He didn’t have the heart to tell Jack this, but his spaghetti and meatballs were terrible. God bless the guy, he was happy to do all the cooking, but he really wasn’t that good of a cook. Gabriel wasn’t sure he’d ever eaten spaghetti and meatballs before marrying Jack, and honestly he would have been happy to never eat them again. The cardboard meatballs and runny marinara sauce didn’t stop Jesse from wolfing his second plate down, of course. Crying had taken a lot out of him today and he was as hungry as ever.  
  
“Does that sound good, buddy?” Gabe asked hopefully. That way they could avoid any incidents like today entirely.  
  
Jesse looked over at him and offered a small nod in agreement.  
  
“Oh, I'm sure that's what you wanted, more training,” Jack teased. “Tell him your punishment’s over, Jess. He can stop torturing you now.”  
  
Jesse’s cracked a smile but he didn’t say anything, he just kept eating. He was always happy when his owners were happy. After a long hard day, things were finally starting to settle back to normal and they could all relax a little.  
  
Gabriel was the first to finish, with half his plate still full of food. He stood up to clear the rest of the table. He put away the leftovers, brought the pots and pans over to the sink, and started in on the dishes. He stepped back into the dining room to collect Jack’s plate.  
  
“You know, Jesse, I wanted to ask you where you learned to ride horses,” Jack mentioned, ever so casually.  
  
Gabe stilled. Jack just couldn't let that go, huh? He had to ask. Jesse was poking at the tomatoes on his nearly-empty plate but stopped when he heard the question. He put his fork down and shrugged.  
  
“You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want.” Jack assured him.  
  
“Sir taught me,” Jesse said after a moment.  
  
“Sir?” Jack repeated the word. “Your old owner? Is that what you called him?”  
  
Jesse nodded. "I mean, that weren't his name or nothin'. Other people called him other things. Grandpa and, uh, dad. Sometimes Mister. Iono. I forget.”  
  
Gabriel slowly moved to sit down at the table. This was the first peek they’d ever gotten into Jesse’s life before he met them. The dishes could wait.  
  
“Yeah, did he own horses like my brother?” Jack asked carefully, inviting Jesse to tell them more.  
  
Jesse nodded again. “Yeah…” He whispered, clearly lost in the memory of something. “If I cleaned the stables good he let me ride. Subs ain’t really supposed to be riding horses, I don’t think. He let me. He showed me how. He… he....” Jesse's voice trailed off.  
  
Gabriel had imagined Jesse's past and previous owners before. He'd thought up a hundred different reasons why the sub had been so bloody and bruised when he found him. Sometimes he imagined fighting pits. He imagined some hardened older owner showing Jesse how to take a punch, or starving him whenever he lost a match. Sometimes he imagined Jesse’s previous owner was some asshole living in a trailer out by the interstate. The kind of guy who kept his sub on a chain in the backyard. Sometimes Gabe didn’t even imagine an owner, but a corporation who tested products on subs and kept them locked in crowded cages at laboratories.  
  
The last thing he would have imagined was that Jesse was kept on a quiet country farm with open fields to ride horses in and animals to care for. It sounded like he was given chores and rewarded for completing them. Hell, his previous owner seemed to have kids and grandkids around him. This must have been who taught him all the official positions. Jesse had probably been part of a big family. Had he wandered away from the farm one day and been unable to find his way back? Were they still looking for him?  
  
They knew more about Jesse now than they ever had, but something about this still didn't quite add up.  
  
“Jesse, is he the one who put that spiked collar on you and left you in the woods?” Gabe asked in confusion.  
  
Jesse jerked back, chair scraping across the floor. For a second there it seemed like he would snap, like he would throw something or try and flip over the table.  
  
"What?” He asked, a tone of hurt in his voice that Gabe had never heard from him before. “No! Sir was good to me!” He insisted.  
  
“Okay-“  
  
“He took care of me!” Jesse interrupted, raising his voice. “He let me sleep in my own bed! He took me to the hospital when my arm got hurt!” He stood up suddenly and gestured with his stump. “Everyone else said I was too bad off, that I should be put down! His daughters all wanted me dead! He paid all his money for surgery! He took care of me!”  
  
“Okay, Jesse.” Gabriel said calmly. “I understand. I’m sorry I was wrong. Please lower your voice.”  
  
Jesse seemed to realize that he was standing up and shouting at his owners. He didn’t immediately back down, but after a few moments his bottom lip began to tremble and tears welled up in his big brown eyes. “He…” Jesse swallowed hard. “He… he didn’t…”  
  
Jack reached out to take Jesse’s hand and squeeze it gently.  
  
“He didn’t wake up.” Jesse whispered, forcing the words out. “He went to sleep and he didn’t wake up.”  
  
“Oh, Jesse.” Jack breathed, heartache in his voice.  
  
Gabriel dropped his gaze.  
  
“I shook his shoulder. I brought him food. I asked him please to wake up. I told him I’d be good forever. I would do all my chores if he woke up. I wasn’t no bad sub, but sometimes I forgot.” Jesse’s voice was breaking as he spoke. Hot tears, the last of what he had, rolled down his cheeks. “I begged him. I... He didn’t wake up.”  
  
Whatever anger had gripped him moments ago was gone. He sat back down in the chair, defeated. He cried softly for a moment, looking down at his lap and shaking his head. “I didn’t know how to work the phone. I tried pushing the buttons. Ain’t nobody came for three whole days. His daughters they… they sold all his stuff.” Jesse sobbed at the thought. “Got rid of the horse. And his book, his favorite book, the one he read every night. They got rid of it. Threw it away like trash. Got rid of me too.”  
  
Although it didn’t seem right to interrupt him in these moments, Jack spoke up. “Jesse, I’m so sorry that happened to you,” he said.  
  
Jesse pulled his hand back from Jack’s grasp and wiped his eyes. “My other owners after that, they's the ones who..." His breath hitched. He shook his head from side to side. He couldn't go on. Whatever memories he'd been chasing earlier were gone, and now he was keeping others at bay.  
  
“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell us about them if you’re not ready,” Jack allowed after a long moment of silence.  
  
Gabe’s heart hurt; it was damn near to splitting in his chest. Three days alone with the dead body of a loved one. The idea was harrowing. All this time he thought of how tough it must have been to be hit and hurt and starved. Little did he know, Jesse had endured all that and worse. Losing an owner was so hard on some subs they never recovered.  
  
“Sometimes in my bad dreams, y’all don’t wake up.” Jesse whispered. “I shake your shoulder.” He lifted his head and looked right at Gabriel. “I beg you. I say please, I’ll be a good boy, but you don’t wake up.”  
  
Gabriel felt his eyes burn. He steeled himself at once, scrubbing a hand over his face. He couldn’t remember the last time he cried and he wasn’t going to start now. He stood instead, and went to hold Jesse in his arms.  
  
"I’m not dying any time soon,” he promised. “Jack isn’t either.”  


* * *

  
Gabriel was the last person to come to bed. He usually spent his evenings contacting work, taking care of any bills or any other business that needed to get done. Tonight he spent half the night staring at his dim tablet screen, thinking of Jesse.  
  
He thought of Jesse’s smile when he was riding the horse earlier. The way he’d sobbed in the car. At the time, Gabriel had just thought he was sobbing because he was in trouble, but he was probably thinking of his old owner. He’d been glued to the windows when they drove past the barn. It made so much more sense now.  
  
He wondered about other things. Little things Jesse had done over the past few months. Why did he break things when he was angry? Had someone else done that in front of him? Why was he so nervous to get his first few baths? Was he punished for using water or trying to clean himself off in the past? Why did he flinch at the sight of the yellow rubber gloves they kept under the sink? Did these things have deeper meanings too? Or was he reading into Jesse’s behavior too much?  
  
Gabriel was grateful for everything Jesse had divulged at the dinner table, but the picture of his past was still so incomplete. What had happened after his old owner died? Was he taken to a state facility? Was he put up for auction? Left on the side of the road somewhere with a pile of trash? Jesse had mentioned the ‘daughters’ of his previous owner. Had they been the ones to abuse him? Was he taken in by someone else afterwards? Were the fighting pits and roadside trailer of Gabe's imagination still a reality?  
  
He wanted to ask but he knew he couldn't. Not outright. Not so soon. Jesse needed time.  
  
He spent so long wondering about it he hardly realized how late it was. His watch told him it was 1AM and he knew he needed to get to sleep. He made a sweep of the house, locking the doors and turning out the lights. He slid in the chair at the dining room where Jesse had sat. His heart ached in his chest remembering the way the sub looked at him, telling Gabe about his nightmare. Gabe washed up in the bathroom. His eyes lingered on the tub where Jack had bathed Jesse this morning.  
  
Whatever had happened to Jesse  before, at least he was happy now. He had owners who cared for him, who kissed him, who made him smile and laugh. At the very least, Jesse had people who loved him. Nothing could make up for the past, but the rest of his life would be a good one. He’d earned it. A hundred times over, he’d earned it.  
  
Gabe didn’t turn the light on when he went to the bedroom, as he didn’t want to wake Jack or Jesse. They were cuddled up together on one half of the bed. He gently pulled back the covers. One of Jesse’s alphabet books was sitting on the empty space on the mattress. Jack must have been working on reading before they fell asleep. He put it on the nightstand before crawling into bed.  
  
Gabriel cuddled up close to Jesse. “Sweet dreams,” he whispered.  
  
To his surprise, Jesse reached back and took Gabe’s hand. He guided it around his own waist. “Thank you,” he whispered softly, half awake. “I love you, Gabriel.”  
  
Gabe kissed his shoulder. “I love you too.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> .  
> .  
> .  
>  thanks for reading
> 
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